A man once lived on the moon.
When he first got there, it was a very exciting place to live. All the weird moon rocks. The grey powdery sand. The impressive craters. That odd cheesy smell.
But it got old pretty quick.
Soon the man felt very alone. The loneliness was so bad that he started talking to the rocks. He gave them names like Trudy and Vincent, Albert and Camille. Then one day, as if by magic, the rocks began to talk back.
Trudy sound like a flirty Southern Belle, calling him names like “suga” and “dumplin”. Vincent was an angry New Yorker who used the word “fuck” for emphasis. Albert was the smart guy who tried to reason with the rest. And Camille had a very timid and shy voice.
On one particularly boring night, it was rough and tumble Vincent who brought up what everyone else was thinking.
“We gotta get the fuck off the moon,” he said loudly.
Unfortunately not even Albert could come up with an idea on how to do so.
Then the man came to a decision. He once heard a rumor that there was a doorway on the dark side of the moon that would take you anywhere you wanted to go.
“Do you realize how absurd that sounds?” protested Albert.
And while the man agreed, he knew he had to do something. So he stuffed the rocks in his pockets and headed for the dark side of the moon.
After weeks of walking, the man came to the largest crater he had ever seen.
“I do declare, that is one enormous crater!” Trudy gaped.
There was nothing to do but walk all the way around it. Days later when he reached the other side, the man sat down to rest. Truth be told, he was dead tired and ready to give up. Chances were when he got to the dark side of the moon he would freeze and die anyway.
He took the rocks out of his pocket and sat them next to him in the dust. Everyone was quiet for a long time. Then of all the rocks, it was Camille who finally spoke:
“If you don’t try, you’ll never know,” she simply said.
No one could argue her logic, not even Albert.
Once again the man stuff his pants with the rocks and continued to make his way to the dark side of the moon. It was tough going. So many times he wanted to give up. Lie in the dust. Wait for whatever end would come.
Each time Camille said the same thing, “if you don’t try, you’ll never know.”
42 days after he started, the man arrived at the dark side of the moon.
After a brief pause, he cautiously stepped into the enormous shadow, and was immediately consumed by a blazing light.
When his eyes adjusted, he could barely make out a couple running ahead of him laughing as they danced into the light. As they embraced, he realized they were exactly what he imagined Trudy and Vincent to look like if they were people.
Next he saw the figure of Albert who was holding a stack of large books. He gave the man a wink through his horn rimmed glass before marching slowly into the light.
And last he saw the beautiful figure of Camille standing next to him. Her golden hair was flowing in the light. Her glass blue eyes shining as she smiled at him.
“We’re home Michael,” she simply said as she took his hand and brought him into the light.