Corey liked to drink. A lot. He loved the antiseptic smell of it. He loved the burn in his mouth and throat as it went down. He loved the buzz that rose from his toes to the tip of his head. Corey loved to drink.
Unfortunately Corey was a blackout drunk. He would drink a 24 packet of beer, a fifth of tequila and a jug of wine. Then he would start doing the stupid things, the things that made everyone angry, the things that he would never remember.
There was the time he stripped naked and ran through the courtyard of his apartment hollering: “the British are coming! The British are coming!”
Or the time he thought he was a bird and hopped off of his second floor balcony. Thankfully the bushes were enough to break his fall, albeit a few nasty scratches and bruises.
As if the drunken behavior was not off-putting enough, Corey was even worse the next day. He would call up his friends and yell at them: “What the fuck happened last night? Why am I covered in fucking blood?!”—as if it were their faults and not his.
Corey lost a lot of friends that way. In fact, he lost most of his friends. Corey could not keep a girlfriend either. As soon as they were dating and things were swimming along, he would get blind drunk and screw her best friend or her cousin’s sister.
Corey was a different person when he was drunk, but since he could not remember he did not believe it. Until the day he woke up in the hospital, his body strapped to his bed and his head pounding like a thousand hammers on nails.
Corey decided to try AA. At his first meeting, he wanted to laugh out loud at the morons who talked about the horrors of drinking. Old men who looked pathetically sad. Shaky ladies who wept when they talked. A few drunk guys bobbing in the corner. Corey’s assessment: “This shit’s not for me.”
A few days later, Corey was back to drinking. A few months later he was back in the hospital. This time, he didn’t wake up.
He was stuck in a fantastic dream. The world was like clouds. Or maybe it was heaven. There were tons of naked ladies, hot ones. And they all had different brands of beer from all over the world. Jesus was there, giving him a big thumbs up. Yeah, it must’ve been heaven.
But as quick as the dream began, it ended. There was only darkness.